Apply Generously

29th July 2006, Singapore - Things took an extraordinary turn for the better overnight after the last report in The Newsstan(d). The runs came to a halt. Investigations are underway to locate those suspected of uttering prayers.

Prayers when applied and exercised generously in accordance to guidelines by the Manufacturer and duty of the Distributor have the power to move even mountains.

Application of "Prayer"
- This product is safe for both external application and ingestion.
- For external application, apply in huge sweeping motions, but targetting specific areas of soreness is strongly advised.
- For ingestion, chew on it without ceasing for maximum effect and fastest resolution.
- Adults: Unlimited dose. No restriction for children.
- Non-allergenic. Non-toxic.
- Extra strength and easy to absorb.
- Many positive side effects expected.

The Runs & The Run

22nd July, Singapore - The editor has been unwell since returning to the island city. His current state? Shrivelled and wrinkled like a dried up prune or a sun-dried tomato void of its luscious red sheen...well, at least that's how he sees it.

But don't start sending him text messages to check on his condition. He suggests you save the pennies and radiation and focus on intercession. "Prayers work wonders even though medicine may not", he says. He slides back in his seat looking uncomfortable but catches my questioning look as he raises his eyes to catch mine. "You must be thinking I'm itching or aching with my shifting from side to side. Well neither. I'm sore from a non-stop bout of diarhoea since midnight on Tues. Have you ever used up a roll of paper in 24 hours?" he asks as with an uncanny sense of accomplishment.

The NewsStan(d) understands the editor obtained medication like lomotil from his family doctor at midweek but that hasn't stopped the irregular and overactive bowel activity. It's understood he's also downed two tiny bottles of a repulsive bitter-pungent forumla produced in Macau which his mother believes will stop the runs, but this may be the first case of diarrhoea that continues to persist. We can only suspect the editor's mom to be upset the product has failed her son.

"I'm currently on charcoal pills. Decided I'd give it a try and dropped by a pharmacy to pick a box up yesterday. I think it's still too early to tell if it's working, but I hope to spend more time being productive than just sitting on the throne. It's indeed a sor(e)-ry state I'd like to get out of soon," joked the editor.

There were also unconfirmed reports that the editor had taken part in a race this morning at the Botanic Gardens, to which he said he was thankful to God for enabling him to complete the 2.2 kilometre run that pit his organisation against others in the annual Corporate Community Games.

"I want to keep on running, but I sure wouldn't mind the runs stopping!"

The West Australian Times edition

16th July, Perth, Western Australia � Today�s weekend edition of The NewsStan(d) is published in the thick of a dry winter Down Under, with farmers praying for rains that will quench this season's thirsty crops. With overnight temperatures the past week dipping to 3�C, even the editor wasn�t having it easy. Where�s a leather jacket when you need it most?!

It�s otherwise been largely glorious blue skies with slight cloud cover, with a couple of bleak wet periods. Even as God refreshes the earth, He generously bestoweth on us His grace. �G-R-A-C-E� as defined by today�s preacher at Subiaco Church was �God�s Riches At Christ�s Expense!� Indeed, that is the ultimate grace He�s lavished upon us.

Thank God for His daily grace even these past few days. Dorcas is well and counting down her days to graduation. She�s well on track to wearing the �mortar board� and realising her desire and love to help children with learning difficulties. The week�s been � hmm� the editor hardly ever falls short of words. How should he say it? Ok�it�s been rejuvenating-ly slow. Rejuvenating in the sense that it�s been a great week off away from the day-to-day manic of work and rejuvenating in the sense of making up for lost time or rather, the time we�ve lived �separate� lives. But here, time seems to come to a standstill. No hurry, no rush, no urgency to do anything. Maybe it�s just the paralysing cold of winter. But yes, I thank God for not only every remembrance of the ones I love, but even more for the moments you can physically spend with them.


Even as I type, I know that tomorrow I�ll leave behind (once more) Dorcas whom I know God will be ever faithful to attend to and care for, and ten stalks of orange tulips that I know Dorcas will faithfully tend to (till they wither).

Strikes, Spares & Prayers

10th July 2006, Singapore - MediaCorp's men's team emerged victorious at the weekend's Corporate Community Games after a dismal performance at last year's finals. Unleashing just enough strikes and spares, the team of three spinners and a hook bowler rose to the challenge, edging out their nearest rival by a mere 4 pins.

The team's bowling convenor who was absent at the finals, spoke to The NewsStan(d) following the award-presentation ceremony at The Chevrons. "It was a blast to have our team top the qualifiers and roll off in the finals. I knew they had lots to prove following lat year's crash out in the finals. Must have been nerves but they didn't show that this year and it was all about mental mettle".

Citing the need to be at church, the born-again Christian said he'd toyed with the idea of skipping worship service at church to be with his team in the thick of battle. But after careful consideration of his priorities, he felt more at ease to stick to his regular Sunday morning plans and just say a prayer for his bowlers.

"I uttered a silent prayer that our bowlers go out there and do their best and they did. No doubt, divine intervention helped!" He said he was pleased with the news though not totally surprised. "It may have seemed an inconsequential prayer, like so what if God allowed our team to win and so what if He didn't? What honour does it bring Him? Well, the fact that my God answers seemingly trivial requests reassures me He's all the more willing to seriously answer petitions for life's bigger issues. God gets the glory for the win!"

Matthew 6:33

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.